Today I lost my great grandmother at the age of 99. Not only was she a strong, independent woman, but she was also one of my main role models and a very important person in my life. I knew it was coming, but for some odd reason I always feel like my family members are going to be around forever. When my grandpa died last year, I couldn't even fully grasp the fact that he was no longer there. Sometimes I still feel as if I walk into his house tomorrow he’ll still be there, but I know that’s not true. I know that as much as I don’t want to believe it, I know that just a few blocks away, her house is vacant, everything in its place just the way it was when she passed.

I've been put in charge of keeping the family together. Everyone is devastated and for some reason I’m looked at as the strong one and a lot of responsibilities have been put on me. How am I supposed to have time to grieve when I’m the glue holding the pieces of my broken family together? I haven’t really had time to process anything yet and I don’t really know how that’s going to go over. It’s not like she was a distant family member, she lived almost right next door to me my whole life, I spent every holiday and birthday there, and most family dinner nights as well. Having to fill that void and look at her house everyday sucks. A lot.